Clubbing Outside, How Bout Nah?

Recently, I’ve been hating going out to clubs. Don’t know why, but I’ve been loving the pre drinks (are you a “pres” or a “prinks” person hmmmm?) and the people there, but when the group migrates to the bus stop… I end up feeling a tad unenthusiastic or unwell. It’s probably in my head, but I also end up feeling so tired; I apologise, make a half hearted excuse, go home and whack a pizza in my oven. 

Whilst I do enjoy getting my party on and consuming a vast quantity of alcohol, I’ve been extremely anxious about going out in the past few weeks. (Note, I have not been diagnosed with any mental health condition and do acknowledge that anxiety and feeling anxious is something that everyone feels; I will write about my feelings of anxiety and how I deal with it.) There’s no real reason or cause why I’m feeling a bit antisocial in the clubbing scene; I’m normally bubbly and up for a good sesh. 

But I sometimes feel that the sesh in toon (working on my Northern) is overrated: 

  • IT’S COLD IN THE NORTH/WINTER, yet it’s still not ok to go out in a puffer jacket (until some drunk geezer wants to borrow it because they’re cold… I’ll give you the short answer of “no f*cking chance”)
  • The Bus Journey – whilst it’s an absolute HOOT to play backseat (there were 5 on the backseat of the bus *on the bus* there were 5 on the backseat of the bus *who gives a f…*) it gets old very quickly when the bus drivers know what’s going on upstairs and refuse to move… meaning your 20 minute bus route becomes a forty-fiver. But I do love bus journeys for the sesh, as everyone is buzzing and chanting (Derwent’s got asbestos! Derwent’s got asbestos! Aye aye aye aye! / Oh you can’t spell Goodricke without dick / I’m Langwith til I dieeeeeee [ya get the idea])
  • The taxi ride back (or Uber… more to come on my distaste for Uber…) – I’M A BROKE STUDENT AND THESE RIP OFF PRICES (even when split between mates) ARE YA KIDDING ME MAN?! Need I say more?
  • Crowds – anyone else not a fan of playing sardines in the whole club rather than just the dance floor/pit?
  • People who are more drunk than you – you’ve either gotta look after them and risk being thrown up on or attract a whole lotta unwanted attention, or get as drunk/even more wasted than them. Good times. 
  • It’s so bloody expensive – yes the club owners know we are students and this broke-ass-mofos and yes the clubs need to make profits, but I’m already paying £6 for a bucket (oioi Salvo doing it right) or being ripped off at £7 for a g&t (yeah Revs, I’m looking at you)… I’m always saddened by the fact you’ve gotta pay a fiver entry (i.e. that’s costing me two jägerbombs just to get inside.)
  • Mardy bouncers that treat you like crap and refuse your queue-jump-and-discounted law society card – I paid £10 for that and am doing a law degree, this is not ok. 
  • Being single and not being able to pull because I’m too awkward🙃

But despite my moaning, I’m not 100% an old lady, and love a good night out; I’ll bounce back soon and hit the ground, not running but face first with a double vodka lemonade in my hand🍻


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